The meaning of the name Adohi is "From The Woods."

I decided today that I would name my red-tailed hawk Adohi. This is when I thought she was a he. It turns out Adohi is actually a girl, but I'm known for naming animals opposite of their appropriate gender. The day I rescued Adohi, I wrote about what happened. I want to keep a reminder here of what happened that day.


I just had a huge emotional breakdown after watching a semi knock this full grown hawk for a loop. He was sprawled out on his back in the middle of the highway. I stopped my car, put on the emergency lights and walked over to it. It wasn't moving, but it I could see its huge chest move up and down. By this time I've infuriated at least 50 people with the entire highway backed up. I am so scared of the talons. I touch its tail to see if it will move. It doesn't. I touch its sharp talons, maybe to prepare for what I could be on the receiving end of. I take a deep breath and scoop him into my hands, holding firmly, but away from my body. In the few feet it took to put him in the grass from the pavement of the highway, he jolted awake and started cocking his head, looking at me curiously. I said out loud, "Please don't bite me, please don't bite me, please don't bite me." I put him down in the grass safely. A man walks up to me, introduces himself as Mike, a fireman from Lancaster. He gets the Carolina Raptor Center  on the phone. Mike wrapped up the hawk in his coat and is now transporting the hawk to Huntersville. We traded numbers, so he will be in touch with me and I will know if the bird makes it or not. Call me stupid, I'm a softy for wildlife.

 

This is Adohi on that day. February 21, 2012.

I was able to keep up with Adohi's progress at a website where the Carolina Raptor Center keeps track of all their daily care. You can view that website here and a list of their current patients here: http://raptormed.carolinaraptorcenter.org/

Adohi did remarkably well during her five night stay at CRC. Yes, you read that right, she recovered well enough in just five days. These birds are resilient.

Adohi was brought to my home this morning and released to 300 acres of dense forest with many creeks and a nearby cow pasture with a big pond. She will have a good life here.

I've learned some interesting things about red-tails. The first thing is that they're monogamous, which means they only mate with one other hawk for their entire lives, unless one dies. Hopefully, Adohi should have enough time to find a mate before this Spring. He will be her forever, companion.

The other thing is that a red-tailed hawk's call is exactly that of which you may think a bald eagle's is. If you search on youtube, a bald eagle actually has a cackling call. Red-tails have the super awesome majestic sounding scream.

19 degrees!

It is just now getting cold here! Last night the wind could really bite right through bones. I was browsing through some Winter jackets yesterday when I came across this little gem for Marley. It's double layered on the inside, so it's super warm! And the best part? It was on clearance, 50% off, so I only paid $12!!!


Marley's coat was way too small at this point and is ready to be donated.

I bought it a size too big in hopes we'll be able to use it next Winter, too!

I Suck At Blog Posting

I really need to get better at this!! Wow! Lol. :)

Vincent started pre-school!!! He loves it and I know it's the perfect fit for him!

V at his Thanksgiving party.

So a lot has happened since my last blog post. Marley is now 14 months old! She had a wonderful "Winter One-derland" themed party. We had so much fun!

Sylvia makes beeeautiful cakes!!! 

My beautiful birthday girl!

Cream cheese, olive, carrot penguins!

Penguin and snowman oreos!

Chocolate covered marshmallows!

A boy and girl version of little penguin balloons I made, using black helium balloons, construction paper, markers, and tape!

We also had an awesome Christmas morning. My mom cooked breakfast at my house that morning and we spent the evening with all of our extended family and ate dinner. A lot of our family members were able to meet Marley for the first time. Great fun and cheer was had by all. :) 

Dr. K, myself, and Marley with red cheeks from fighting being restrained.

On Jan. 3rd, 2012, Marley had her THIRD cord blood infusion at Duke University Hospital. It was so awesome! We met a news crew from Charlotte there at Duke and they did a full story which I expect to air soon. Hooray for more awareness! We were also able to meet some other hydro families there, which to me, was the highlight of the trip! Next to the creamed corn breath, of course. :) We learned of some awesome news! Marley has enough blood left to do a FOURTH infusion!!!! Woohoo!!! So exciting!!!!

 

Our new hydro friends!!!! We had such an AWESOME time together!!

Shortly after we were home from Duke, Vincent came down with a stomach bug. He didn't eat one solid thing for four days. It was quite scary! He got so dehydrated, that he was admitted to the hospital overnight for fluids and observation. He kept diarrhea for a long time, but only vomited for about 8 hours. Then, myself, Marley, my husband, my mom, dad, and brother all proceeded to get the virus, too. It was rough! I've never seen so much puke and poop in my life and I really don't care to ever again!

Marley had her strabismus surgery on Jan. 10th, 2012. She was in surgery for a little over an hour and everything went smoothly. The point of this surgery is to weaken the eye muscles in the corners of Marley's eyes so that her eyes will be straightened, and to also avoid double vision. We've had GREAT success with this surgery. The benefits are just astounding. We are very pleased with our results so far, but understand that it takes 3 months for a full surgical result. The after care is very simple. All we had to do was put one droplet of ointment in each eye until the follow-up appointment, which was just a few days later. And that was it! So simple! Marley was back to herself quickly after she woke up from anesthesia.

After Marley's strabismus surgery, she got the stomach bug. It was pretty rough on her, but she only vomited Wednesday morning after her surgery and then she was still eating and drinking just fine over the next few days, but still had the diarrhea part of it going on. Friday morning, Marley had a really bad diaper. She started shaking really bad and she turned blue. I took her to the pediatrician, and she checked out fine. She was fairly irritable all day, but still ate and drank just fine. Friday night, I am so thankful that Josh had just come in the door when Marley vomited all over me. Projectile vomited. And she vomited every single thing she had taken in that day. It was nuts. She started shaking uncontrollably, I think from the force of the vomit. So off to the E.R. we went.






At the E.R. they did a CT scan which revealed a lot more than we bargained for. Marley's ventricles were collapsed because her shunt overdrained, which also resulted in a subdural hemorrhage, which is another word for "brain bleed." We were transported by ambulance to LCH  and ended up needing to stay for four nights to monitor the bleed, to make sure it didn't get worse. If it had gotten worse quickly, the bleed would need to be surgically drained. There's still a chance that it could need to be, but we're going for another scan in a few weeks to check up on it. Marley's shunt was adjusted to 100 to enable her ventricles to poof out a bit and give her brain some cushioning. She tolerated the adjustment very well and she was feeling much better in no time.

Waiting to be transported from our local hospital.

Going into the ambulance. She tolerated the ride well, but was inconsolable once we got to LCH.

Getting some rest as her new shunt adjustment got to work.

Back to her happy self in her LCH jail crib. :)

We've since had an ophthalmologist follow up, everything checked out great, and another neurosurgery follow up, everything checked out great there as well and pending a scheduled scan to check on the bleed. :)  

Now we're ready for some Valentine's day fun and planning Vincent's next birthday! I think that covers it! :)

"Duck?" You decide!

Neurosurgery Follow-up

Today we had a neurosurgery follow-up just to be sure everything is still well with Marley's shunt. Vincent was miraculously well-behaved during the almost hour long time that we sat in the waiting room!! There was an 8-year-old little boy there to keep him company. People go to neurosurgery for all sorts of reasons, and  congenital hydrocephalus was not one of those reasons that I would assume the 8-year-old was there for, so when I started talking to his mother and she told me he had hydrocephalus discovered at 16 weeks gestation, I was a little surprised!

When I walked up to the seating area, this little boy was reading a children's book aloud. Amazing. I got to talk to his mother for a little over an hour, and learned more about their experiences, including the onset of epilepsy. When I asked her how old he was when that happened, she told me, "You don't want to know," considering it onset close to the age Marley is now. If it does happen to Marley, I will just do my best to handle it with as much grace as my friends have shown me, with unwavering faith. Until then, I'll (do my best) to stick with some of the best advice I've ever been given as a child: "Don't worry about it until it happens."

Anxiety is a tricky thing. I might sound crazy, but I feel like I'm constantly at war with myself in trying to control my thoughts and not let all of the "what ifs" creep in and destroy my day. I'm truly doing my best to take control of my own mind and choose to be happy, whether my body feels like it wants to be or not. This really has nothing to do with what's going on in my life, because I really have too much to be thankful for to let anything get me down. I know it's possible to do and I will!


The actual appointment went great. Marley has been really bashful to people she doesn't recognize straight away, and usually buries her head into my chest, but she reached right out to her doctor. I thought it was so sweet! The relationship with our neuro has changed quite a bit. As he compared Marley's MRI from December to her latest CT scan last month, he said "This is a drastic improvement. I'd say she has six months to a year for more brain growth until we need to turn the flow on her shunt down."

What wonderful news, all the way around! We won't need to be seen again (hopefully!) for three more months. He even gave Vincent a toy car when we left... how sweet!

I am overflowing with thankfulness for how the last 11 months have played out. It almost doesn't seem like reality. I don't want anyone to think I'm skipping along, rosy cheeks and all smiles as if I'm oblivious to some of the experiences others are facing. I'm praying for you and your little ones every day, and I wish I could take it all away from them myself, if only I could.

Playground Infatuation

Today after our O.T. sessions we headed to a beautiful little park close to where my husband works. It's just beautiful. It's very small, but it has two playsets with slides, monkey bars, and also there's a set of swings, which is encircled by a paved jogging/walking track. On one of the play sets there are bells that have different tones when you smack them with bare hands. Vincent and I found that the bells are really loud if you smack them with a stick mallet! Beyond this playground, is a beautiful view of open vegetation followed by forest. The breeze brought loads of little dandelion fluffs floating whimsically into the air. Today was such a beautiful day. The breeze made it a perfect day to go. Vincent and I found two empty snail shells. Poor guys! But, he thought they were pretty interesting to look at. Airplanes sometimes circle over the park and I don't just mean way, way up high. We could see lots of details on the planes as they went overhead. My little boy is in all out train/airplane phase. He waved excitedly to each airplane that flew nearby. We will need to invest in a box of sidewalk chalk for my little artist; as there were masterpieces left behind already. What a great idea!

Vincent climbed on the play sets and slid down the slides. He attempted the monkey bars by himself, but screamed as he just hung there. He's still a bit too small for those yet, but nice try! He absolutely loved running around with three other little boys. I pushed him on the swings for about an entire 20 minutes. Swinging is amazing for his vestibular awareness! It's a sensory thing. I think, perhaps, it was the little girl who was being pushed by her mommy on the swing next to him that kept him so attentive. Every time the two would swing in sync, he looked over to her and giggled and made kissing noises. Sheesh. He's only two and a half! I may add that after swinging time was over, he tried to follow her around and she was not having it! Poor little guy, already being rejected by the ladies.

 And yes, that is a messy cheesy chips face.

Computed Tomography, Reminiscence, and a Divine Appointment

Today was quite an interesting day. So much went on today that I'm just not going to cram it all into one blog post, but I'll talk about a majority of it.


Marlena had a routine CT scan to confirm fusion of her sagittal suture at CMC-Charlotte. The radiology department brought back memories of when I went for the fetal MRI to rule out holoprosencephaly for my baby girl. I was very misinformed about what kind of sedation they were planning to use. It was just a little medicine in Marley's mouth that made her very sleepy. No general anesthesia as I had been informed before. I really did think that was going to be over kill. *rolls eyes*


Everything went really smoothly with her sedation medicine and the actual scan. I got my CD from the film library and started to head home, only I parked in a deck that was pretty far from the radiology department and couldn't remember how to get back to it from within the hospital. CMC-Charlotte is huge. You have Levine's Children Hospital, the main hospital building, and then another building full of specialty centers. In the specialty centers, also includes the maternal-fetal medicine office that followed me during pregnancy. As the nurse was escorting me through the hospital, she asked me if I had come by a Starbucks when I came up to radiology. "No," I said, "I came around on the sidewalk." Then she was confused. She stopped and wanted to know what color my parking ticket was. The hallway was bustling with hospital employees darting to grab lunch. A woman wearing a CMC badge overheard our conversation and she stopped and asked me to show her my parking ticket. I showed it to her and she said, "You're parked where I'm parked, come with me, I'll show you." So then we were on our way.


Marlena was still pretty out of it. Drunk, even. "Sorry, she's still pretty loopy. She had sedation for her CT scan."

"For Sagittal Synostosis?" asked the woman.

Now let me clarify to you all; I never once had any conversation with this woman prior to getting assistance with directions in the hospital as mentioned above.

I was a little shocked. Alright, well, a LOT shocked. Is it really that obvious?

"How did you know that?" 

 "My son is now 17 years old and had surgery by Dr. Hefner at six months old."

Dr. Hefner is a neurosurgeon in the same group of surgeons that Marley sees.

She invited me to her office, which just so happens to be in the same office as my maternal-fetal medicine facility. As I stepped through the door that leads to the patient rooms, memories flooded back in from months before.

The fear. Unknown. Devastation. Helplessness. No control. Tears. Brain damage. Limited quality of life.

Holoprosencephaly. 

TERMINATION?

Isn't it amazing how feelings can flood through you like a waterfall crashing down over your head, almost like that era in life flashing before your eyes in seconds? I shook the feeling as I looked down at Marley. I wanted to go find my "brain specialist" maternal-fetal medicine doctor. I should have walked down that hallway and opened every door until I found him to show him she's worth resuscitation, which is something he suggested that I consider at birth. He was heavily HPE minded at this point. When she was born, I recall her one minute APGAR score being a four. The report read that she was floppy and cyanotic with copious amounts of amniotic fluid in her mouth. I didn't hear her cry. I started to ask pressingly, as I was laying there on the table, waiting for it, "Why isn't she crying?" She was resuscitated. Her five minute APGAR score was a nine. That's my girl.

His profile on the office website reads: "Consultant for you and your OB/GYN with 30 years experience and a special interest in problem pregnancies, especially "planning for next time."

Problem pregnancies? Special interest? Especially planning for next time? Don't make me sick. God doesn't make junk. That's not just a quirky saying. It's the truth.


Regardless, God loves this man, too. I will pray for him.


I've gone way off course. Are you still following me? I have the attention span of a goldfish and my writing isn't great, but at least I get my opinions across.


So back to this lady's office we went. She showed me pictures of her children, and of her son who underwent the cranial surgery. She reached out to me. I am a firm believer that in a hallway of crowded people in the middle of the biggest hospital in our area during lunch rush, that things like this don't "just happen." A cousin of mine calls these "God winks." I've had several of these. It's nice to recognize them.


It gave me a small peace of mind to hear her story face to face. I have her name and her phone number. She's a very lovely, smart woman named Bobbie. If Marley needs surgery, I will have someone there to help me through it who's BTDT.


I'm still unsure of necessity. Necessity is the big question for me. Bobbie suggests that it is always absolutely necessary, as many of the cranio moms I've met on Facebook have. I'm not convinced, though. The idea of necessity is that cranio puts pressure on the brain in all the wrong places and can damage it. Marley's brain is already compromised by pressure, so this is why I'm unsure if cranio that is secondary to ventricular shunt placement is always necessary. Ultimately, I know it's up to me. I just can't imagine myself handing over a happy, smiley Marlena to a surgeon to break her skull open and have a field day in there. Typing that last sentence out just now really helped solidify the reality of the situation for me. It may not be brain surgery, but it is the closest you can get.


I'm just going to hold out on the fact that no one's confirmed that her suture is fused yet. I know in my heart that it probably is, but all of our hydro kids have oddly shaped heads. So if at all possible, I just want to leave her as she is. Her head is beautiful as it is.